I probably know less about being pregnant than an 8-year-old. That may be an exaggeration but there have been a lot of unexpecteds.
For example, I didn’t know that pregnancy weeks were counted from the date of your last period — so that you actually get two “bonus” weeks to count once you actually know you are pregnant. How embarrassing! But, it was sure nice to go from 2 weeks to 4 weeks in a millisecond back there in the beginning of all this.
Things I didn’t expect:
- Morning sickness 24 hours a day for a month.
- Massive struggle to get up early
- That it would take so long to show at all
- No weight gain for months
- How long the first trimester would feel
- That I would see my baby’s heartbeat at less than 6 weeks in
- Horrible indigestion
- Dizziness and shortness of breath so easily so early on
- That the doctor offers only one ultrasound at 20 weeks
- That I wouldn’t get to take hot baths (my fav!)
- That I would get to eat most seafood that I like (thought it was all off limits!)
- Depression from progesterone
- How awful coffee would taste
- That I could see baby’s arms and legs flailing around at only 12 weeks!
So those are just a few things. Clearly, I’ve never read up pregnancy and still have tons of stuff to experience in the next five months. I’m actually starting to read some books about having a newborn — figured I shouldn’t go totally blindsided into that one! Thanks to my friend Melinda, who is a doula, for giving me some great recommendations so far. (By the way, she says “What To Expect When You’re Expecting” is NOT the one to read — so I’ve ordered some others per her suggestion!)
So far all I know is that labor totally freaks me out, breastfeeding sounds kind of awful and I’m worried about having post-partum depression, among other things!
Boy do I sound like a positive Polly? I AM so grateful and excited but…I think you read so much about how hard it is to have a baby that people forget to talk enough about the great parts. Also, I recognize how many people out there would give anything to be pregnant — and they aren’t. This isn’t complaining — just a lot of thoughts wandering through my mind!
Somebody Should Have Warned Me
I’m so thankful that last year I found this article, “Somebody Should Have Warned Me,” which I was glad I could easily Google just now. I remember reading it and thinking YES, I will need this. I have remembered it ever since — and I’m relishing it now. I love it all but the last paragraph is worth copying (the whole thing is great though):
They should’ve warned me that becoming a mommy would absolutely change every single thing, but that I would never want to go back and visit the “old” me, not even for a second. They should’ve warned me that my life was about to become so rich and beautiful and fulfilling, that I’d look back on what it was before and think, “Poor me. I didn’t know her yet.”
It’s scary being a first time pregnant person. Everything is new and my body feels a tad bit not my own. What is it doing? Just yesterday, I finally felt like there was a legitimate bump. It’s cool but feels and looks a little strange to me.
Only In Dreams
All my life — since I was a teenager — I’ve had dreams that I was pregnant. It always seemed so magical, even a little glamorous. In my dreams, I was always very pregnant and just amazed at my belly holding a person inside.
Now, my dreams have literally come true. There is a little person inside my belly. And they are growing bigger everyday. They have already developed everything they need to be who they are. In fact, that part of them was determined at the very beginning of it all.
Pretty soon, I will have the belly in my dreams. Pretty soon, I will feel someone kicking me from the inside. Pretty soon, I’ll know that feeling that you always hear about — that you love someone more than you ever knew you could. And yes, I’m pretty scared about everything, but really, I can’t wait.
*I know I put this in the last post but ohmygosh, there they are!
I just hit 26 weeks with my first baby and reading this was like I wrote it. I felt all the same things in the beginning and it wasn’t until around 16-17 weeks that things started to change. Once you feel the baby move it become real!
I also started reading a lot as well and became more informed about birth and caring for a newborn. Labor has always terrified me and breastfeeding freaked me out. Now I feel like I’ve gotten to a place where it’s no longer scary and I’m actually excited to see what my body is capable of. I’ve been taking Hypnobirthing classes, as well as a Breastfeeding class and a Baby Care class, all of which really helped.
I also recommend reading The Thinking Woman’s Guide to Childbirth and Birthing From Within. Great books that helped get me more informed and calm the nerves a bit 🙂
Thanks Sarah. Wow, that really makes me feel better. I just started reading some stuff. I had not even thought about doing much reading but now I want to gobble it up. You are right, that is a great way to look at it. Thanks for the suggestions! I am thinking of taking a breastfeeding class and a baby care class with my husband maybe!
Love this. It’s so amazing how much we all learn so differently, bc nobody actually talks about the details of pregnancy with women unless they’re in nursing/medical school or ARE pregnant. Crazy.
I asked my Dr about the hot bath thing right off. She said to do it bc it’ll relieve back pain and aches, but just don’t go splashing around in a hot tub. She said I won’t boil the baby 😉
So happy for you and loving your updates!
Thanks Melissa! Really? I just read no hot baths but guess if the water is lower and my stomach is more sticking out of the water it can’t hurt! I may have to give in!
My doc said baths are fine, just not *too* hot… I’ve also heard to make sure you drink water during as that will help regulate your body temp 🙂
I’m totally with you on everything else!! I’m still waiting for a real bump.. I just look like I had a couple cheeseburgers! And I’m only feeling quickening, still waiting, not-so-patiently for the first real kick! And the after birth? I’ve read enough blogs I’m more afraid of that than the actual birth at this point! But.. maybe that will make reality not seem as bad… maybe?