So I’ve got to get real with you about my marathon thoughts. I’ve probably done this before but bear with me mmmk?
While I was reading “Mile Markers” I couldn’t help but cringe a little every time the author mentioned her times.
1:35 1/2 marathon? 3:36 full marathon? I seriously doubt I will ever see those numbers.
Yowza! I know we are all different. We have different bodies, different ages, different goals — I get it. But I can’t help but be a little down about how slow I feel.
I have a IRL friend who runs marathons too but she never trains as hard as me — not even close. Yet, she goes in there and is 2 seconds from a BQ. I ran with my sister in a half marathon recently. She just had a baby and hadn’t run that distance in God knows how long. I could NOT keep up with her. (BTW, she is running Chicago this weekend on minimal training…!)
|Fast friend Maggie and me 🙂|
I used to think if I broke 4 hours, I would cross the finish line and break into tears. Lately, I’ve been thinking — you better break 4 hours or you suck. Ugh, this number is haunting me. [Truth: I KNOW that I won’t suck even if I don’t…I’m just venting!]
But I know my attitude is off. I need to believe that I CAN do it, put my mind to it and then, do it. I need to recognize that marathons are personal and comparison will never help. There’s always going to be someone faster.
It’s called PR for a reason — PERSONAL record. Hello crazy pants! (I’m talking to myself.)
I’m also fearing the inevitable, which is this: somewhere between mile 15 and mile 20, I will start an irrational thought process that goes something like this: why did you ever think you could break 4 hours? And…who even cares? Why do even run marathons in the first place? This is too hard…ugh, you are doing this again — on purpose — in three weeks? Moron! Can’t.Go.Faster.
Um, does anyone know what I mean? But…here’s the thing — I can plan for this right? And I have my mantra — “you have to be willing to hurt” or for something a little more positive, “I run this body!” (Thank you Saucony and Dorothy for getting that one into my head!)
Obviously, I’m overthinking (classic…) but I gotta get my head straight cause don’t you know…
This is 10% luck,
15% concentrated power of will,
And 100% reason to remember the name!
Best last-mile-of-a-marathon song ever? I think so.
Anyway, maybe it’s the 21-miler hanging over my head on Saturday, maybe it’s because I know I’ve basically dropped my leg work since quitting Crossfit. But, this I know: I’ve tried harder for this marathon than the others. I have a different, stronger mental attitude. That combination of factors should result in some major improvement. And I’ve even got two shots…but god love me I hope it’s the first one!