This is the first time I’ve sat down to truly process what my hopes and dreams for you are. This week, you have grown a LOT and you are making some big moves in my tummy. I feel you all the time and I think to myself — what is that little guy doing in there? I still can’t believe you’re real — that I will meet you soon. It’s been a long 8 months — and a lot longer many more years that I’ve been dreaming you into being.
I’ve been thinking about all the people that already love you — that have loved you since you were just a thought, just two cells coming together. And then I thought about how there’s something about every one of those people that I want to breathe into your life. We are so lucky to have such people in our lives — we are privileged in love beyond measure. You all know who you are! 🙂
Of course the person that loves you most of all is your Dad. His whole being exists and moves in love for you and me. I never even knew someone could love us so much — and that’s why of all the people in this world that I hope you are like, it’s him that matters most.
Not everyone has such an abundance of love in their heart, and is actually able to express in in a way that the people around them know that it’s there. But, we walk every day in word and action feeling the effects of this love from him. And I hope this ability is something you inherit, Jacob.
Your Dad has overcome so many obstacles — and he never gives up. He never loses hope — and he begins again, again and again. He embodies resilience and and has worked harder than any human being I’ve ever known to better himself — and he’s actually DONE it. It’s a beautiful thing.
He has a faith and dedication that I envy, trusting in and praying to God in such humility and trust. He prayed for you and he thanks God for you every single day. He is strong, even when he doesn’t think he is and he is a better human being than he’d ever give himself credit for.
Most people just talk about things they will do. He actually does them — the things that matter and make our life better. He sometimes gets scared and anxious but he perseveres and that’s what matters. And I hope you too will have the kind of grit.
Jacob, you have a Dad that loves you maybe more than any Dad has ever loved his child before. My prayer for you…one of the many prayers for you…is that these beautiful qualities in your Dad will be passed down to you.
Of course he is not perfect but it’s his imperfect struggle and success that makes him the amazing person he is. I would hope nothing more than for you to have such wonderful things in you. And I know you will because we are determined to raise a boy full of love, goodness, kindness, strength, respect and compassion.
This is the first of many thoughts I have about who I hope you will be. I love you so much already — and so does your Dad.